Inner Turmoil

I wonder how I can stay positive? I dont want to be bitter, but.... its kind of hard not to. Man's imperfection has hurt me to the point of bitterness. My own imperfections have played their ugly hand.... its like "COME ON"! I stayed stuck on stupid because of my love for someone too long. Not loving yourself first never ends up like you thought it would.
So now I'm trying to learn how to do this. I thought getting baptized was the hardest thing I ever had to do... But I was wrong, living up to that dedication is proving to be harder. I want what a lot of girls want, I want to be loved as well as truly love someone. Simple right? WRONG! You cant be truly loved if you dont love yourself first. If you dont love yourself first you wont stand up for what's right for you, and if you dont do that you wont be happy. If you're not happy, how can you expect to make someone else happy? You see what I mean? It doesnt work... In order to live up to my dedication I have to remember how much Jehovah loves me and how much he tells me I'm worth all of this every day. But my imperfection says if you love me why do you allow me to remain single. Dont you see I'm wasting away here, hurting like only you would understand. Then he tells me, that he cant give me what I'm asking him for if I wont appreciate it when he gives it to me. That seems simple to understand right??? Wrong! I got a lot of work to do. I need to work up to being the woman I want to be treated like. Oh man! I got work to do.