Fighting reclusiveness!

I DO NOT LIKE THEM SAM I AM! I DON'T LIKE FAKERS! Its not hard to know where you stand with me. If I don't like you, you know it. If I like you, I think you know. I'm not a run up in your face and talk to you all the time person. However, I'll chat with you, and if you know me. Then you learn I'm as silly and goofy as they come. But lately I've been battling with myself. You see, I can be mean and be fine with being that way, its a protection. However that new personality tells me not to be mean. So if I stop being mean does that mean that I've stopped feeling the way that I did to make me respond that way in the first place? I don't get over serious things so quickly. I'm really trying to get over things faster than I used to. But then I don't feel like I'm being true to myself. I don't know, I'm starting to feel like why even befriend people when they try their darnedest not to show their true selves. UGH! Not wanting to be bothered these days with the fakers....