Non-Sleeping Excitement

Last night I tried to go to sleep, I must've tossed and turned for about two hours before I fell asleep. One thing that I know was plaguing me was that I was going back to work the next day after being off for over a week. But going to work normally doesn't bother me as I am truly grateful for having a job. And then to like what I do and the people I work with who could ask anything more. I know I was wrestling with thoughts some I didn't want to face and others that would have me SO EXCITED I wouldn't be able to sleep.

Let me talk in riddles for a moment. At one point once I was past the sheep, there we were. We were in your bedroom, although it was a room I did not recognize. And we were laying on the bed talking. When our conversation became real and on an emotional note, you asked that we move to the living room. Which was perfectly fine with me. But in true you form you playfully almost closed the door on me. And as I laughed I told you I was real and that you were really talking to me. Then came the heartfelt conversation. You asked me all the whys and I told you, no pulling back the punches or softening my blows. Not that I was attacking you, but sensitive subjects tend to take on that tone. In the living room we had an audience. But they seem to appreciate my words as validation and sound to their hearts. You mournfully listened. And for the I don't know (how many) time you cried. I don't think my words changed your mind, but you listened and you heard me. A side you don't often show, after all you're a man, and YOU make sure everyone knows it. It was an interesting experience, and one I questioned later. I guess my heart wants to speak with you. But my mind will not allow this to happen. Its over and done....



OK so, enough of that. I'm going on a trip! EXCITEMENT! JOY! Since I made the irresponsible decision that caused me to have to grow up a lot sooner than a lot of my friends. Its been very rare that I've done anything that speaks my youth and singleness and not in service to someone else! So at the end of this month, I'm going on a trip. My child will not go. (WHOA!) Me and three single cousins stepping out into the world. WATCH OUT NOW! Its times like this when I wish that I was a fashionista, I gotta pull two wonderful outfits out of my no-dressing closet. I'm HATING the way my clothes are fitting me right now. Oh well! I get to go out of town like a real grown-up I'm so EXCITED! YES!